6个恋爱心理技巧，你掌握了几个？
<section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;" data-mpa-powered-by="yiban.io"><br/></section><p></p><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">很多人认为爱情是一门玄学，不知情从何起，也不知为何爱着爱着就分了……</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">但在心理学家看来，爱情是一门科学。成功的约会和恋爱不仅有规律，而且可预测。<br/><br/>今天就来介绍，</span><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);">你可以早点知道的6个恋爱心理学小技巧。</span></strong></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">知道这些，更容易抓住幸福。<br/></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/></span><span style="font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;font-size: 23px;"><strong>第一印象很重要</strong></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">第一印象也称</span><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);">首因效应</span></strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">，由美国心理学家洛钦斯提出，指人际交往中，最先了解到的信息会影响后续对人的判断。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">虽然它不一定总是正确，但却最牢固、最鲜明。<br/><br/></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);">初次会面，45秒就能产生第一印象</span></strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">，包括长相、穿着、姿态等。这些印象会成为判断一个人的主要依据。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">所以想要赢在第一次约会，有诀窍。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">社会心理学家艾根总结出五要素，简称为“Soler”：</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);">S(sit),坐或站的是面对对方；O（open)，姿势自然开放；L（lean）身体微微前倾；E（eyes）目光接触；R（relax）放松。</span></strong></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/><strong style="color: rgb(47, 47, 47);font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;font-size: 15px;letter-spacing: 2px;white-space: normal;"></strong></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 23px;"><strong><span style="font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">熟悉的人，更容易互相喜欢</span></strong></span><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/><br/>心理学家扎荣茨实验证明人们会偏好自己熟悉的事物，这叫做</span><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);"><strong>多看效应</strong></span><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);">。</span></strong></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">在人际交往中，</span><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);">我们见到某个人的次数越多，就会觉得此人招人喜爱。</span></strong></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">人们很容易喜欢上自己的同学、邻居以及朋友等总是出现在身边的人，原来不是因为身边的这个人就比其他人优秀，而是……看多了，自然就喜欢。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;"></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(119, 119, 119);font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;font-size: 12px;letter-spacing: 1.5px;text-align: center;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">《老友记》从朋友变情侣的瑞秋和罗斯</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">所以，想让一个人喜欢上自己，可以先去Ta面前多晃晃，先试着当朋友。<br/><br/></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">但是，多看效应的发生也需要前提。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">这个刺激必须是中性的，如果一开始就让人感到厌恶的人或事，只会适得其反。<br/><br/></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/></span></section><section style="margin-right: 16px;margin-left: 16px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Helvetica Neue, PingFang SC, Hiragino Sans GB, Microsoft YaHei UI, Microsoft YaHei, Arial, sans-serif;letter-spacing: 0.544px;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);text-align: center;line-height: 1.75em;"></section><section style="margin-right: 16px;margin-left: 16px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Helvetica Neue, PingFang SC, Hiragino Sans GB, Microsoft YaHei UI, Microsoft YaHei, Arial, sans-serif;letter-spacing: 0.544px;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="letter-spacing: 2px;"><strong><span style="letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;font-size: 23px;">危险刺激的行为，能促进心动</span></strong></span><br/></section><section style="margin-right: 16px;margin-left: 16px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Helvetica Neue, PingFang SC, Hiragino Sans GB, Microsoft YaHei UI, Microsoft YaHei, Arial, sans-serif;letter-spacing: 0.544px;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="letter-spacing: 2px;"><strong><span style="letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;font-size: 23px;"><br/></span></strong></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">问：如何让一个人快速爱上你？</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/>答：带Ta去找找刺激。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">这是美国心理学家阿瑟·亚伦发现的一个心理现象，</span><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);">吊桥效应。</span></strong></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);"><br/></span></strong></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">当人在危险的情境中，会不由自主地心跳加速，呼吸急促，容易促成浪漫、心动的发生。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">所以电影里总演不腻英雄救美。<br/><br/></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">想要让心动发生或者找回心动的感觉，可以一起去坐过山车，逛鬼屋……</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">一起跑步、健身、冲浪……这些能让生理唤起的运动也是一个很好的选择。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><br/></section><section style="margin-right: 16px;margin-left: 16px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Helvetica Neue, PingFang SC, Hiragino Sans GB, Microsoft YaHei UI, Microsoft YaHei, Arial, sans-serif;letter-spacing: 0.544px;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);text-align: center;"><strong style="font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;font-size: 23px;letter-spacing: 0.544px;text-align: justify;"></strong></section><section style="margin-right: 16px;margin-left: 16px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Helvetica Neue, PingFang SC, Hiragino Sans GB, Microsoft YaHei UI, Microsoft YaHei, Arial, sans-serif;letter-spacing: 0.544px;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 23px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">问答36个问题，就能让感情火速升温</span></strong></span><br/></section><section style="margin-right: 16px;margin-left: 16px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Helvetica Neue, PingFang SC, Hiragino Sans GB, Microsoft YaHei UI, Microsoft YaHei, Arial, sans-serif;letter-spacing: 0.544px;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 23px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;"><strong><span style="color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/></span></strong></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">心理学家Arthur Aron通过实验证明，两个陌生人彼此问答36个问题，就有可能</span><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);">相爱。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">这36个问题不是随便问问，而是设计好的非常私密的情感问题。比如：<br/></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="color: rgb(119, 119, 119);"><em><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;">如果可以在世界上所有人中任意选择，你想邀请谁共进晚餐？</span></em></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="color: rgb(119, 119, 119);"><em><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/>你和母亲之间的关系是怎样的？</span></em></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="color: rgb(119, 119, 119);"><em><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/>假如你知道自己在一年内就会突然死去，你会改变现在的生活方式吗？为什么？</span></em></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">这种情感的</span><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);"><strong>自我披露</strong></span><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">，能快速提高亲密度和信任感。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">Arthur Aron对此总结道：</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><em><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(119, 119, 119);">发展亲密关系的关键，是要双方不断持续和深入地相互坦白自己的内心。只要两个人彼此足够坦诚、相互分享交流，人们可以快速喜欢上一个陌生人。</span></em></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">所以也适用于在一起很久的伴侣，想要快速升温的情侣或夫妻，可以试试。<br/><br/></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/></span></section><section style="margin-right: 16px;margin-left: 16px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Helvetica Neue, PingFang SC, Hiragino Sans GB, Microsoft YaHei UI, Microsoft YaHei, Arial, sans-serif;letter-spacing: 0.544px;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);text-align: center;"></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 23px;"><strong><span style="font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">向爱人表达感激，能够立刻感到幸福</span></strong></span><br/></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">心理学研究发现，一个人的幸福指数，取决于他对所爱的人表现出多少感激。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">是的，向爱人表达感激，发自内心地说声谢谢，这个简单的举动能让你立刻感到幸福。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">而且越是不幸福的人，越是能通过表达感激获得更高的幸福感。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">所以，</span><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);"><strong>当你觉得不幸福，更应该去感恩你爱的人，很快会看到效果。</strong></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"><br/></span></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;"></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 23px;"><strong><span style="font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">稳定的爱情本质上是交换 </span></strong></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">必须承认当亲密关系稳定之后，一定存在相互依赖和交换。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">相互依赖理论认为，</span><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);"><strong>我们寻求以最小代价获取能提供最大奖赏价值的人继交往。</strong></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">代价，是具有惩罚性的、令人不悦的体验，比如心理或身体的受伤，压力等。亲密关系中最常见的代价是心理负担。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">奖赏不只是肉眼可见的物品，也包括令人愉悦的情感经验，比如从关系中获得的支持、鼓励、愉悦感。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;letter-spacing: 2px;color: rgb(48, 107, 182);">要保持满意的亲密关系，需要保持至少5：1的奖赏-代价比率。</span></strong><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">如果长期超过这个比例，亲密关系就可能迎来破裂。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><br/><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">按照这个比例，也可以时常检视自己的亲密关系是否平衡，彼此获得的奖赏和代价是否对等。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;">从互相交换的角度来看，亲密关系反倒更容易维系。</span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"> </span></section><section style="text-align: center;margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;"></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(119, 119, 119);font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;font-size: 12px;letter-spacing: 1.5px;text-align: center;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="color: rgb(119, 119, 119);letter-spacing: 1.5px;text-align: center;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">法国电影</span>《爱》中相伴到老的夫妻</span><br/></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(119, 119, 119);font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;font-size: 12px;letter-spacing: 1.5px;text-align: center;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br/></span></section><section style="margin-left: 16px;margin-right: 16px;line-height: 1.75em;"><span style="font-size: 15px;font-family: Optima-Regular, PingFangTC-light;color: rgb(47, 47, 47);letter-spacing: 2px;"></span></section><section style="margin-right: 16px;margin-left: 16px;font-family: -apple-system-font, BlinkMacSystemFont, Helvetica Neue, PingFang SC, Hiragino Sans GB, Microsoft YaHei UI, Microsoft YaHei, Arial, sans-serif;letter-spacing: 0.544px;white-space: normal;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);line-height: 1.75em;"><br/></section><p></p><link rel="stylesheet" href="//www.yongchuantong.com/source/plugin/wcn_editor/public/wcn_editor_fit.css?v134_iP4" id="wcn_editor_css"/>
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